Wrapping up..... but not forever

I wanted to write a post to wrap things up from the trip, and give my perspective on being back in the States for a couple of weeks now.

As of two weeks ago, Jeremiah and I made the journey back home to the States.

We spent our last few days in Cameroon enjoying our time with newfound friends, playing Pinochle with the Snells, and trying to get as much in at the hospital as possible. In the last week I think helped with about 5 C-sections in 3 days. yesss! We said our (tearful...on my part) goodbyes, and left the place that would change our lives forever.

I wake up every morning missing Cameroon. This is no exaggeration. This trip for me was not some sort of emotional high, or mountain-top experience (although it did involve a lot of mountains, both literally and figuratively), but it was more than that. Cameroon in my mind represents the greatest month of my life, hands down, for several reasons:

I saw God in the eyes of those Cameroonian people. Just look at the picture of that little girl with the big eyes. Something about them, how could you not love that? I enjoyed sharing in the life of every single person that we met there. I loved learning about their families, their dreams, their lives. And they were always so eager to share with us. No one even hesitated in welcoming us into their homes, their bible studies, their soccer games, their OR.

God shaped my thinking that month. I think differently about life now. I realized again how much bigger the world is than my little self-contained bubble. My life is not just about me, and it shouldnt be anyways. What reverse culture shock it was to come back to the states, to get thrown back into American culture. I spent a month without my cell phone, without my car, without my typical American 22 yr-old girl's day to day worries...and I loved it. How refreshing it was to wake up in the morning and not think about ....what outfit I was going to wear that day, or how much money I could make if I took this other job, or who's going to win America's Next Top Model this season?! (ok...I really havent ever woken up completely distressed about who is going to win a tv show....especially that one. Im not going to say I dont love that show, though...). But instead my thoughts were about what patients we would see that day, what I could bring to the children's ward that they would like, and how I couldnt wait to hang out with Elvyn and get to know her better. My month in Cameroon was about other people, not just me. I was a part of something bigger than myself, more important than me, and that is what changed the way I think. That is how it is supposed to be. And that is hard.

Please pray for me. I want the things I learned in Cameroon to stick. Already it is as if there is a war in my mind between how I thought about things, people, myself, before I left for this trip, and how I was thinking about things while I was there. I am still processing how I need to balance these thoughts and live my life accordingly to what I learned. It is a difficult thing, but I want to be a good steward of what I learned. I want the rest of my life from this point on, the decisions I make, the direction I move in, to be about this bigger picture, not just me. On that note....

Cameroon also represents a time where I was able to use the talents, interest in medicine, and compassion for people that I believe the Lord has given me in a full time, every single day- kind of way. It was awesome. Completely fulfilling. To me, medicine is a ministry, a way to reach people and touch them and show them love in a very practical way. There is something about seeing a person who is hurting physically, just looking them in their hurt filled eyes, and then helping them. Healing a wound, saying "Ashiah" to them, healing a spirit. It becomes the same thing. God is using physicians all around the world to bring His love to hurting people through medicine. How cool is that. It makes me want to be a part of something like that even more.

If you have ever been to a foreign country, especially one close to a third world country, you know that what you see there changes you instantly. You dont have to spend a month in a place like that to realize how good you have it. It is hard coming back to the states where I have tons of clothes, money, and infinite opportunities at my fingertips (all by the grace of God, I am so thankful for how blessed I am). However it is hard to balance that with the fact that people around the world, my friends, have next to nothing. What do I do with that? How do I process that in my mind......Half of me wants to just give up everything I have and move over there tomorrow, and half of me wants to stay here and prepare myself to go help out with something over there when I have something more to offer. I am still trying to figure this out: because in my mind, once you have seen something like that, once you have experienced it, you are responsible for it. I know God didnt allow me to travel halfway across the world to experience and see the things I did - just to come back and sit on my butt, enjoying my perfect little life in blissful ignorance once again. I am now accountable for what I saw, and responsible to do something accordingly about it.

So what do I do with all of this? Cameroon did change me to the point of making some decisions. Again, please pray for me. Pray for Jeremiah also. I cant tell you what a blessing it was to have someone to share all of this with first hand. We both are thinking about these things at the exact same time. Both of us are considering medical school again. Pray for that. We want to search out God's plan for our lives. Pray for that. The people of Cameroon need to be shown the love of Christ, as do all countries throughout this world. I want to be a part of that somehow. Just please continue to pray for God's direction in our lives.

Once again, I want to thank you all so much for your amazing support throughout our trip. I truly saw what the body of Christ is supposed to look like in you. You encouraged us beyond what you even know just by reading this, praying for us, emailing us. Thank you.

AND NOW!!! Pictures!!

Try this link... http://picasaweb.google.com/RachelTeat/Africa

I posted pictures to an online Picasa album. Please let me know if it doesnt work.
Be prepared: There are a lot!!!


Love you all!
Rachel